Most gamers, even the casual ones, know about the Classic PC Alignment chart. Say it with me my friends…
|GOOD||Lawful Good||Neutral Good||Chaotic Good|
|NEUTRAL||Lawful Neutral||Neutral Neutral||Chaotic Neutral|
|EVIL||Lawful Evil||Neutral Evil||Chaotic Evil|
While a good chart, there have been a few additions over the years. The standard sub-classifications of a few of the slots on the chart (in no particular order) are: Lawful Good Paladin Asshole, Lawful Stupid, True Neutral, Neutral Apathetic, Neutral Psychotic, Chaotic Schizophrenic, Chaotic Greedy, and Scenery-Chewing Over The Top Chaotic Evil Ham.
We’ve argued these alignments over character actions for decades now, laughing and accusing in equal measure. It wasn’t until 1983 that anyone decided to apply the same methodology to the Players themselves:
Jeff Okamoto and Sandy Petersen: The whole thing started around 1983 or so at a party at Pacificon at the Dunfey Hotel in San Mateo in which the idea came up of classifying the different styles of roleplaying. They came up with four different types, which are explained below. Special credit goes to Perry Caro, Chris Guthrie, Rick Heli, Robert Allen, and Ken Kaufman, to name a few. The Real Man The tough macho type who walks up to the attacking dragon and orders it to leave before he gets hurt. The Real Roleplayer The intelligent cunning guy who tricks the constable into letting you all out of prison. The Loonie The guy who will do anything for a cheap laugh, including casting a fireball at ground zero. The Munchkin [Rules Lawyering Min/Maxer, ed.] Need we say more?
If you’ve never read it, check out the complete classic RRLM table by Jeff Okamoto, Sandy Petersen, and lots of others.
Hours of entertainment have been found applying the RRLM definitions to fellow players and either embracing or denying the charges. Personally, I tend to play the Real-Men/Real-Roleplayer types, but never let that stop you from enjoying a witty Loonie player. When they’re not disrupting the game, that is.
GM: “The ground opens up in front of you. Your enemy, the Silver Knight, hovers above the chasm. What do you want to do?”
Kyle: “I’ll make another sign.”
GM: “What does it say?”
Kyle: “Do not play on or around crevice.”
I hadn’t seen any new Player classifications in years, not until a game last week when a fellow Player described a person in his other game as a True Dickhead Gamer. It sounded a bit harsh at first, but then he presented unto us a convenient new chart by Blue Boxer Rebellion:
Ladies and Gentlemen, Elves and Dwarves of all ages, we have a new chart to annoy fellow players with. Sure it’s a bit rudimentary, and could probably use a couple more spokes for Harmless Loonie vs Campaign-Killing Loonie, but it’s a great start.
Let the accusations, denials and gleeful acceptances commence!